Darth Vader will not perform at Trump’s inauguration

Another surprising name can now be added to the list of celebrities unwilling to perform in Donald Trump’s inauguration. The Sith Lord Darth Vader can now be added to the list of people such as Elton John, the Dixie Chicks, Garth Brooks, and Moby. To many Republicans, this news comes as a shock, as earlier this week, rumours had spread that Vader would be attending.

Darth Vader will not be attending Donald Trump’s presidential inauguration.

Seen recently in the film Rogue One, a spokesperson for Darth Vader has confirmed that the Sith Lord has refused to attend the ceremony. When a member of Trump’s transition team released a statement that Lord Vader had accepted a deal to make an appearance, the Sith Lord released the following video.

Donald Trump immediately went to twitter, claiming that “Vader is a whiny little loser. Can’t even find the Death Star plans. Sad!”.

Donald Trump tweets: Darth Vader is a whiny little loser. Can't even find the Death Star Plans. Sad!

Pundits have noted that the Death Star was a monumental build project, which created trillions of jobs over twenty years. In contrast, Donald Trump’s biggest build project is a proposed wall at the border with Mexico, but as of yet, no concrete plans have been made for the construction, or for funding the project.

It is also unclear what Darth Vader’s role would have been during the inauguration. While many celebrities are musical performers, Vader is best known for enforcing order in the Galaxy. Some suggest that Trump had aspirations to follow in the footsteps of Grand Moff Tarkin, and to have Vader force-choke his enemies.

In a final message, Darth Vader warned Trump to “Be careful not to choke on your aspirations” to a visibly distressed President-elect.

Author: Nick Matthews

A software developer and English major. Full time geek.

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